Last issue of the quarter, kids. Summer time’s next. I’m going to spend mine doing research essential to my improvement as weatherhuman – I will study the sun.

I will go where it shines all day, every day, and I will study it. I will note where it rises and sets. I will watch its reflection on the water. I will log the colors it makes when it’s light mixes with the atmosphere in the evening, register the effects its rays have when mixed with alcohol, observe the effects of its heat on interactions with others – whoa. Got to remind myself – this is research.

Thursday’s forecast: visits to the X-man and the liquor store. How else can you study a thing like this properly?