I am writing a paper for a certain social science class tonight and I seem to have lost the assignment sheet.

Rather than researching, I have developed an exciting new social science theory. I call it the “one paper theory.” Basically, the idea is that every lower division social science class contains the same term paper assignment. I’ll put it in more pretentious jargon later.

It involves analyzing an ad for sexist or racist content and explaining how society is the culprit. Occasionally they throw you a curve and assign a book or a TV show.

Anyhow, time to dust off the old soc. papers.

Tuesday’s forecast: Five thousand freshmen will be socialized into writing the same paper for four years.