Good Friend, Bad Drunk

Saturday, May 4, 7:30 p.m.: Isla Vista Foot Patrol officers patrolling the 6500 block of Pardall Road were in the process of arresting a woman for being drunk in public when her 22-year-old friend grabbed the officer’s arm because she thought she could stop them from arresting her buddy.

The officers warned her several times to leave the scene, but she didn’t give up. She said she had just come from the Study Hall and that her father was in law enforcement and he would “want her to grab a cop if she was defending herself.”

Daddy’s little girl stuck to her convictions and said, “Go ahead and charge me with battery on a peace officer and my dad will fucking kill you!”

She then said, “He’s more than a sheriff!”

Deputies of the sheriff, the top law enforcement officer in the county, arrested the woman for public intoxication.

Not a Crime, Just Stupid

Saturday May 4, 5:50 p.m.: IVFP officers responded to a call from someone concerned about the sound of breaking glass on the 6600 block of Trigo Road. Officers arrived on the scene and talked to the people who live at the residence in question.

They said they were playing softball and accidentally broke a window in their own house. So they decided to smash up the window, “since it was already broken.”

The officers left the scene, because it is not a crime to break your own stuff.

Sad at 21, Sadder at 45

Saturday, May 4, 7:00 p.m.: IVFP officers patrolling the 1000 block of Embarcadero del Mar saw a 45-year-old male passed out in some bushes. The officers noticed he had “urinated all over his pants.”

The man, who was only a block from his house, did not know where he was, who he was or how he got there – all symptoms of the fact that he’s a 45-year-old guy living in I.V.