UCSB is a notoriously sunny and beautiful place. Here are the top five places to soak up the sun and get burned way faster than you’re willing to admit to any of your friends!
Ever feel bitter about not being able to soak in that vitamin D due to your hour and a half biology lecture? Lucky for you, you can get nice and toasted under the blaring fluorescent lights. Don’t forget to frequently reapply sunscreen to your face in order to prevent an uneven tear-streaked burn.
2. The Path to Sands
Your biweekly run to Sands that projects the appearance of you actually caring about your physical health is the perfect place to sweat off some SPF and see every single Gaucho that is living in I.V. over the summer. Talk about exposure!
3. On Your Electric Skateboard
Nothing screams “Please roast me” quite like riding an electric skateboard. The bright orange wheels are great for attracting the sun’s attention! Try to outrun the UV rays with wicked speeds up to 25 miles per hour for added fun!
4. Outdoor Office Hours
Come cruise by your totally-chill, 30-something-year-old professor’s outdoor office hours and test out a poorly-formulated question about a subject you pretend to be interested in. Prepare to get burned by both the sun and your professor. But remember: There are no dumb questions!
5. Dog-Shit Park
This grassy paradise is ideal for a shirtless study sesh. Surround yourself with days upon days of summer reading knowing very well that you will be the only thing getting red.
Mel A. Noma is a dreamer who has been working on her freckle tan for the past 20 years.