We are in need of nurturing our sexualities when the world doesn’t always know how to love our vaginas as anatomical wonderlands and as metaphors for our blooming femininities. We are in need of exploring our sexualities inside of sex, outside of sex and alongside sex when our sacred openings have been mistaken as lifeless objects in the name of socially constructed “shame.” Well, this shame is not inside of our wet forest landscapes or dry summer breezes flapping between labia lips. This shame is actually outside of us, where fear tries to darken the Earth’s natural light coming from our vulvas. Shame on society for condemning our lady liberation when our liberation is your liberation as well, where our parts gift life over and over again. But there is no shame in our movement to express what has always been expressing artistic creation, as the movement comes from demanding a space to be free. And we are in the revolution to liberate ourselves because our vagina liberation is the only guarantee to this rolling freedom. Our sexualities are made to rise above. Our sexualities are ours. Our sexualities might be shared with you, might love you, need you, expel you, stand alone, be together or always separate, but our sexualities are not defined by any other than the we or the “me.” But our sexualities do need other vaginas — and that is why our troupe is a troupe. Our sexualities come together as our sexuality when solidarity and true love create a union of differences founded on that same magic touch of all things vagina.
And THIS is what we have in common when asked the question: What does your sexuality mean to you?
“My sexuality represents the ownership I have over my own body, and I think that’s a pretty beautiful thing.”
“My sexuality means embracing connections with inner beings
With beauty and resilience
With passion and intensity
My sexuality playing in the light and dark
My sexuality is dancing, expressing and feeling lust
My sexuality ever evolving and creating”
“To me, my sexuality means owning my desires and prioritizing my pleasure as part of my general well-being. It is being honest about what I want and understanding why I want it.”
“To be honest, it means my freedom to own my body and to do with it as I please. I like to claim I’m open with it, but that’s just because I do what makes me feel good, and there are times when I choose to use it and there are times I just wanna keep it locked up. But at the end of the day, it’s mine, and I can do what I want with it, and that’s the important thing.”
“My sexuality is something that is constantly changing as I change as a person. It is never the same, since I am always exploring who I am and what I like. My sexuality is dynamic and ever-morphing; it has different needs and desires at different stages of my life. It is something that I am also learning to take full control of, since sometimes I feel embarrassed or ‘not normal’ to be a sexual person, whether due to pressure from society placed on women or just the way I want people to perceive me. I definitely want to be perceived as a ‘smart’ or ‘funny’ person more so than a ‘sexual person.’ I am still learning to separate the concept of sexuality from its negative connotations and learn how to be proud of pleasuring myself.”
“My sexuality means liberation. It has been a long journey, starting with shame and denial in the form of secret kisses behind the school parking lot with my former girlfriend/same sex partner. Then it was depression and doubt when my family wouldn’t accept me. I wanted their love, and I wanted to change to make them happy. Sexuality is not a choice. I discovered that I cannot (and will not) change myself for the comfort of others. It has taken years for me to be comfortable coming out to others and feel peaceful with any way they choose to respond. My self-worth is not contingent on others’ acceptance of my sexuality. I own it proudly and discuss it freely. My sexuality has given me the opportunity to be liberated in the face of judgment and discrimination. And I am so grateful for that.”
“A lot of people think sexuality only means sex. While sex is involved with my sexuality, strength and empowerment are coupled in there, too. My sexuality is my power. It gives me the power to say yes to what I like and the power to say no to what I don’t. My sexuality allows me to express myself. My sexuality allows me to feel passion, pleasure and pain all at once or not at all. My sexuality gives me the strength to be me.”
“Sexuality, for me, is my ability to come to terms with my sexual and emotional energy (my eroticism, seductiveness, sexiness and strong female energy). It’s a foundational need of mine, but can be tamed and expressed at different times in my life.”
“Frankly, I have come to terms with the fact that I am a hypersexual being, not in the sense that I want to engage in sexual acts with everyone that I meet. I am hypersexual being in the fact that I will give my love to those that earn and appreciate it. For I have learned through the hookup culture here at UCSB that not everyone has your best interest at heart.”
“To discover and explore my needs and desires. Not something that is defined or confined, but fluid to grow and develop exponentially. Something I need to nurture and not to judge.”
“To me, my sexuality means the way I feel about my body and the way I express those feelings to the world. My sexuality gives me the choice to be a wallflower if I feel like blooming and to embrace all that makes me a woman.”
“Sexuality is one thing, but black women’s sexuality has deep roots that still continue to haunt our ability to express our sexuality without being judged for being a woman and then black. My sexuality has given me the opportunity to learn how my body allows love, but has also taught me the world of neglect as well. I believe sexuality is an ongoing path of learning who you are both physically and mentally”
“Female sexuality is difficult to navigate as a young person living within a culture that does not encouragingly foster open conversation nor genuine expression of it. It is exactly this reason that led me to actively and privately uncover my passions, desires and feelings from a very young age. My personal exploration of my sexuality is inseparable from my development as a human being, as the two paralleled each other in metamorphosis. The force of my sexuality is a testament to my insatiable yearning to connect deeply, and a roadmap of where I have been and where I will go.”
“My sexuality means … having wild desires, finding my consenting partner and acting on these desires, but also acknowledging that if those wild desires are no longer desired, “NO” is welcome as a part of that experience.”
“My version of sexuality is realizing that my vagina is mine and no one else can dictate my sexual behavior. Sexuality can express pleasure, love and, in rare cases, both. Sexuality should never be a point of shame, but a point of true empowerment”
“My sexuality means ultimate comfortability with my body. It means letting my body be free. Free to feel, free to love, free to do its thang. Especially after trauma. I’M JUST TRYNNA BE FREE.”
“My sexuality is my pussy and its right to choose
Y’all condemn feminism but wouldn’t walk in my shoes.
I wish for the day the armor we put on is no more
And we are called by our names, not slut or whore.”
And THIS is how different sexualities came together to liberate one another. It is educating in safety and craving to be educated in compassion that brings intersectional vaginas into a single light of triumph. Our sharing is power, as we are more able to understand what one sexuality could not have known about another sexuality before. Sharing will not divide and conqueror us, it shall only keep us together in an eternal springtime blossom season where no flower withers without growing back stronger. This is how we became one. We are here to actively love one another, actively engage and actively learn. Vaginas are rooted in the same Mama Earth, and it is in this Mama Earth where we shall stay rooted as one for always.
Thank you to all of the vaginas for adding depth to our depths. We love all beings <3
The Vaginas of The Vagina Monologues and Herstories productions
PS: “The Vagina Monologues and Herstories” shows are in Campbell Hall on Friday, Feb. 5 at 7:30 p.m. and Saturday, Feb. 6 at 2:00 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Tickets are on sale at the Associated Students Ticket Office. All proceeds of the ticket sales and fundraising go to The Santa Barbara Rape Crisis Center.