Isla Vista: the Holy Grail of underage drinking and the epitome of college towns. Us hardworking and dedicated students of UCSB may be studious during the day but by nightfall, we know how to let loose … a little too well.
1. “Oh shit! My phone is in the toilet again!”
I hope you had that Purell handy!
2. Frat guy: “He just called my Sperry’s ‘slippers’, what the fuck!”
The fragile frat ego.
3. “Ghetto Dora is nothing compared to ghetto Caillou.”
Stoners will tell you things about life that you didn’t even know existed. Apparently, this controversial debate has been going on since two voiceover YouTube videos were posted online.
4. Dude 1: “Did you call me a fuckboy?”
Dude 2: “No…”
Dude 1: “Oh, maybe I just called myself one in my head.”
Funny how the mind can play tricks on you like that. Its ok dude, no one wants to be called a fuckboy. Freudian slip? Possibly.
5. “I wanna ride my bike down some stairs”
Advisory warning: Do not attempt.
6. “Do you even know what our GDP is?”
You know you are in college when people try to use fancy stats about GDP in a conversation, all while completely plastered.
7. “All I care about right now is that basketball hoop pole.”
8. “Walk bitch! You broke my Brita!”
Nothing is better than some good old-fashioned revenge. The rest of the night for this poor girl was probably filled with constant reminders of this tragic event.
9. Did you guys happen to see my glasses in the hot tub?”
10. “We need a ratchet party, and no party is ratchet until someone throws up!”
11. “Conspirist theorist.” *Repeated over and over*
12. “Dude, my scrotum doesn’t separate that much!”
Keep it classy, Isla Vista.