Tsk, tsk. Heracles would be ashamed. Greece has come a damn long way since the days of Aristophanes and men flying through the air on chariots (that’s what the ancient Greeks did, right?). Really, my most prominent memories from my two-week visit to the country last winter are of the Greek people’s fear of African immigrants and the bazillion porn DVDs that littered the cement path leading up to the Parthenon.

But now, a year after my travels, Greeks, both unable and unwilling to pay off the country’s debt, have decided that they value buying stuff (porn maybe?) more than keeping brotherly relations with their neighbors in the European Union. Now that the former prime minister has stepped down, I really don’t think Greeks have anything left to complain about. Not that their economy isn’t still spiraling downhill, but it seems that no one really understands exactly what sets Greece apart from the other European countries. The prime minister’s resignation must signify something good then, right?

I’m no economist, and I have to admit that I approach complicated issues like this as if I were looking at the problems of a troubled friend. In the case of Greece, I would say that the country is like a very hip college student — poor, but unwilling to stop buying hot clothes. The youth are … well, youth, and as we’ve seen in the case of the slightly ridiculous Occupy I.V. in the past few days, young people like to complain about the older generation even if they really don’t know what the hell they are doing. They’ll show up in their tight pants and hip scarves to scream and shout that everything is wrong. Meanwhile, Greece’s friends (the EU) kinda look at it like: “Okay, we have stuff we want to buy too; pay up, biatch.”

All this anger has to be affecting the tourist industry and causing more economic strife. Who wants to be a tourist right now dodging riled up protestors to get to the underground that will take them (hopefully) to the coast? If anything, any violent protests at this point will probably just make matters worse in that respect. Really, Greece has a great tourist industry (obviously), and the shops are always crowded and busy. From my humble perspective, Greece has no reason to be in debt. Where is the money going? War? Gyros?

My only hope is that the ridiculousness of the Italian parallel (as Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi prepares to step down) will distract from the Greek issue and allow the new Prime Minister of Greece, Lucas Papademos, to come up with a quick plan to turn things around.

Berlusconi was well known for his position on illegal immigration, a serious problem facing European countries unfortunate enough (in this case) to be located on the Mediterranean. Just like the Greeks who worry about what to do with the hordes of immigrants pushing bootlegged porn, donuts and other random knickknacks on the streets, Italians have had to take on a huge new impoverished demographic. It’s nearly impossible to walk around Rome these days without being harassed by immigrants who try to get by on the profits from a small bouquet of dying roses. It’s sad but it really doesn’t make the country seem to be in control. And where does that money go?

In short, I think that Greece and Italy will be fine — obviously Italy is a country too important to fall out of the EU, but Greece, I think, could really only be a European country. They have the ancient funky aesthetic that seems to be a requirement for entry into the EU, excellent quality coats (one of the few big purchases I made when I was there) and delicious food to draw in the tourists. Kids are kids and as much as joining the angry crowds on Wall Street — or the grass across from Cajé in I.V. — sounds appealing in some way to me, I really don’t see any reason to worry. Life goes on.

Zachary Babtkis is a fourth-year Middle East studies and film & media studies double major.

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