Guns’N’Water
Those crazy Nexus kids are everywhere toting water guns. They think they can threaten the human with their silly water dispensing machines, but wait till the ‘human unloads a record downpour on their silly asses. Then we’ll see who – or what – the true assassin is. Wednesday’s forecast: With that in mind, here’s hoping […]
Baseball: Gauchos Capitalize on Errors in Victory
Everyone likes presents and UCLA packaged up a game and handed it over to the UCSB baseball team yesterday. The Bruins (25-20 overall) committed four errors leading to four unearned runs for the Gauchos (21-23, 6-9 in the Big West) in Santa Barbara’s 4-3 come-from-behind win.
Sex Is Around the Corner
Life without sex: Sometimes you chose it; sometimes it chooses you. Being abstinent by decision is fulfilling. Being abstinent by default can make a girl crazy. Calm down, I’m going to help. I have some pretty great advice from a highly trained group of professionals: People who have sex regularly. The first step to getting laid is to forget about it. Go rub one out, take a cold shower, go running, anything else.
Board Accepts Update to SB Housing Plan
The Santa Barbara County Board of Supervisors unanimously voted at its meeting yesterday to pass the Housing Element Update – a plan that would increase low-income housing in the area – to Santa Barbara County Planning and Development for review. The plan, which is part of the county’s 5-year long-range development plan required by the State of California, must contain provisions for at least 17,000 additional low-income housing sites in the county. The newly approved plan will now go to the county’s Planning and Development office and receive a new Environmental Impact Report before it is officially adopted, 3rd District Supervisor Brooks Firestone said. He said the HEU could be finalized sometime next year. The current HEU was adopted in March 2004 and will be updated by the newly approved draft in 2009.
M. Lacrosse: SB Advances in Championships
Good things come in threes, and the UCSB men’s lacrosse team is one step closer to a U.S. Lacrosse Men’s Division Intercollegiate Associates (MDIA) National Championship “three-peat” after its 9-5 win over #7-seed UC San Diego yesterday. Santa Barbara stayed alive in the national championship tournament held in Plano, Texas, never trailing after taking a 4-3 lead into halftime.
Death’s Scythe Has Lost Its Potent Blade
I asked Karina if she feared death. She shook her head and told me she didn’t. I wiped my nose, then the whole world washed in around us. I’ll never forget that evening – or early morning I guess you’d call it – my first encounter with exuberant energy, an actual confidence pulsating through my veins.
New CASE Program Gets Split Reviews
Near the end of its first academic year in existence, mixed opinions from participants and the Office of the Student Advocate surround the effectiveness of the College Alcohol Skills Education program. CASE is an eight-session program, run through Student Health for students caught drinking alcohol or using drugs in campus residence halls. Sessions are mandatory for these students, and failure to attend could lead to registration being withheld for subsequent quarters.
Over-eight-ed
The Lakers’ season ended tragically last Saturday evening. The blowout road loss wasn’t the tragic part, even a casual basketball observer could see it coming in the first five minutes – the tragedy was the death of a basketball god.
UCSB Researcher Finds Women Able to Evaluate Men Through Pictures
Released online yesterday, findings in a UCSB researcher’s study suggest women know almost at first glance how long they want men around, whether it be for life or for a short fling.
Lawmakers Target Game on Santa Rosa Island
One of the Channel Islands could become a permanent hunting resort for military personnel, as legislation to turn Santa Rosa Island into a hunting preserve moves through Congress this month.