Blogs
Early last month, a person who doesn’t even go to UCSB made claims at an Associated Students Senate meeting that “the Daily Nexus is really good for toilet paper,” stating further to “please u...
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Hello freshmen! Welcome to my first “Sex with Stench” article, a monthly sex advice column I’ll be doing for Nexustentialism. I’ve chosen watching porn as my first topic because I think it ser...
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Hazing sucks. Dad did it, America did it, but we don’t anymore … right? There has been a rampant increase in reports of hazing here at UCSB and frankly it makes me sick. Looks like this reporter i...
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In an unsurprising and expected series of events, local Isla Vista resident Jackson Smith has finally realized that asking his subleaser to do the bare minimum has proven to be too much for him to han...
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ISLA VISTA, CALIF. - It’s been all the craze. News reports have been coming out of the woodwork in regards to this year’s No-Nut November.
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Section classmates — we all know them, we all love and/or hate them. We’re all forced to spend 50 minutes once a week with them at some point in our undergraduate careers.
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In order to gain an edge over the stiff competition of the god-like surfers and pretty-boy frat stars of Isla Vista, local man Connor Stewart has added a picture of him holding a dead fish to his Tind...
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Never skip a workout at the Rec Cen again with these five tips that will get you so swole, you’ll be bigger than The Rock. Take it from me, I’m swole AF.
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After seeing three ‘reading is sexy’ bumper stickers in the span of two hours (and consistently failing every single chemistry course offered at UCSB), Howard felt the universe was telling her it ...
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Isla Vista, CA - According to several witnesses, the residents of the 67 block of DP are now split into two halves: those who are staunch Bird advocates and those who prefer Limes. A turf war has been...
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Fraternity boys rejoice as their favorite and most played song ever now has an additional value. “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers has officially been voted Best Song To Use To Get Laid by none othe...
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Mo Bamba,” the hit masterpiece by national treasure “Mudboy” Sheck Wes has passed away this weekend at the hands of the song’s discovery by White people.
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It’s the first quarter of college. You shake with anticipation, excited as the future of your unsupervised adult life starts now. There is just one thing off about your perfect new life: your new ro...
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Well, UCSB’s Parents Weekend came and went, and things were less than perfect. Parents Weekend is supposed to be a time when we can stop having anxiety attacks from econ, pretend like our social liv...
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While some may turn to compulsively smoking stogies or crying in the library’s egg chairs during stressful times, freshman Daniel Diaz has taken up a record-breaking stress eating habit.
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“dusty rusty crusty musty ass california hills”
“frowning in plaid (haunted radios, bird bones + anthropomorphized wind)”
“warming my hands on bridges i’ve burnt”
“songs that make me see god”
“My Playlist #236”
“classy wine moment and intellectual conversation”
“90s heroin chic model off duty”
“tweet tweet bird emoji map emoji”
“not my circus, not my monkeys”
“a grave is probably cheaper than an apartment”
“ATE THESE BITCHES LEFT NO CRUMBS / DID IT IN DESIGNER PUMPS”
